HANNA

The Opposite of Tron

Review by: Yumi

I love it when you see an actor finally start to really enjoy themselves and Cate Blanchett looks like she's enjoying the shit out of herself in the new action fairytale Hanna which is out today (28/07/11).  

A third of the way through, I knew with absolute certainty that this was going to be one of my favourite movies for 2011.  And I wasn't disappointed.  (Which is totally different from the time I went and saw Tron at iMax and paid, like 25 bucks and was totally bored and couldn't really get a good nap in and sort of left with a new and unpleasant loathing of Jeff Bridges.)

Cate Blanchett finally puts away all that ethereal shit for a while and just enjoys being a badass in Prada shoes while her friend and fellow Aussie Eric Bana is divine as a sort of mountain-man recluse in fur and a beard and all unwashed and manly.  It's the sort of role Tom Cruise WISHES he could play - but Hollywood knows that when you want manly bearishness, you go to Eric Bana.  I met him once.  He is a big unit.  He's all in proportion.  He looks like he could slaughter a cow, bleed it, gut it, throw it over his shoulders and dance around with it at a blue-light disco.  

Eric was doing press about a car doco he'd made, Love The Beast (2009).  I confessed to Eric when we met that the family car, me and my sprogs had been driving around in for the past 5 years was a Holden but I'd spent 4.9 years sincerely believing it was a Toyota.  He sort of looked through me like I was a small, buzzing insect.  I win people over like that, y'know, with my banter.  

Anyway, the movie Hanna isn't Eric's, nor Cate's.  The film belongs to its 17-year-old star, New York-born but in all other respects, Irish actor Saoirse Ronan. She'd teamed up with the director Joe Wright before on Atonement - for which she was so good she was nominated for a Best Supporting Actress Oscar.  They clearly like each other and her commitment to her character in this film is dazzling.  

The less you know about the plot, the more you'll enjoy the film, suffice to say there's shooting and killing but surprisingly little blood, and the whole thing will likely be compared to Run Lola Run because it is, in essence, one big chase film.

The big drawcard is the soundtrack by The Chemical Bros which is more than just a soundtrack, it's sort of the pulsing heart of Hanna.  Sound design is front-and-central in this film.  You'll see a long tracking shot along a subterranean streetscape that becomes an excuse to make the wailing of a homeless nutcase the lead vocals in a stadium-sized techno anthem.  Oh wait, no - he's gone and now it's the swishing of a broom, or the ringing of a phone, it's a busker, it's...  It's very, very cool.

Hit Girl grows up?  Not so much.  It's more like if Natalie Portman's 14 year-old character in Leon (1994) was raised a steroidal survivalist killer in bleakest Eastern Europe and then unleashed.  Yeah!

STARS: 4 stars!

WHO SHOULD SEE IT?  Action fans, art cinema fans, music fans, ceiling fans, sickofans.

SYNOPSIS: Little girl lives in the forest with daddy.  Knows how to kill things. LOTS of things.

RELEASE DATE: In cinemas today

THE TREE OF LIFE

Cosmic hocus pocus + Suburban Focus + Diplodocus =

Review by: James

2 points before we start.

1) I think Terrence Malick is just fantastic. His Pocahontas epic The New World is great, and The Thin Red Line is my favourite war movie ever. Apart from Stripes.

2) I'm terrified of the retail clothing store "Tree of life". Even being near it makes me uncomfortable. Crystals, feathers, kaftans. It just makes no sense to me at all. But I guess Angus and Julia Stone need to get their outfits from somewhere. 

I disclose the first point however because it means this review is probably biased. Whatever. The second point however was probably unnecessary. (Seriously though, what the fuck is that store? Anyone??) 

Set in a small town in Texas, The Tree of Life follows the story of three young boys, growing up in American suburbia in the 1950's. It centers on the oldest boy, Jack, (Hunter McCracken) who is struggling to come to terms with what is becoming an increasingly complicated world. Split between a wondrous, loving mother (Jessica Chastain), and a stern, driven father (Brad Pitt), Jacks confusion, and discovery, become part of something else much bigger, as we dip in and out of time, and space. Yes space. Did I mention there are dinosaurs? Not in the 1950's. But heaps earlier. So yeah. Sprawling middle-American family drama with dinosaurs.  For a kid, the acting of Hunter McCracken is totally brilliant. As good as you'll see from a young actor. In fact the performances from everyone are excellent, except for maybe Sean Penn, who spends most of his screen time looking like a man who can't remember where he's parked his car. 

 At times, The Tree of Life jumps around without explanation, and it can feel a bit bewildering, but if you can disregard your uncertainty about what’s happening, and trust that you're in good hands, then everything becomes much more enjoyable (much like an unsolicited back massage). On the other hand, there’s a genuine sense of beauty and wonder throughout the whole thing. Every single shot seems to be designed to evoke an emotion. And I love that. I also love just how polarising the response to the film has been. Some people talk about it like they've had some sort of highbrow cinematic orgasm, whilst others seem to hate it more than The Last Airbender. About 5% of audience goers in the States are even walking out mid movie, which I really don't get. Anyone whose heard a little bit about it, or about the director, understands that like his previous movies, it’s a slow, very deliberately paced film. Surely you know what you're getting into before you buy your ticket? Its like that time Jade and I went to that fried chicken place in Nashville (Prince’s) and ordered the extra-hot chicken wings:

Chicken Guy: "Are you sure about that? They are super hot." 

Me: "I'm pretty good with Spicy food"

Chicken Man: " Yeah, It's just that sometimes people find them a little too much...”

Me: "Dude, I think I can handle your chicken wings ok?"

So I ordered the chicken wings, and I you know what? They were waaaaay too spicy. My lips felt like they were being tasered and my eyes were all watering and I was sweating and I couldn't even finish eating the whole thing.  You know what I mean?

The Tree of Life might not be the easiest thing to watch, but it’s unlike anything I've ever seen. Which I guess is a pretty big wrap. I saw it three days ago, and I'm still thinking about it. I'm thinking about my own childhood and the feeling that came with it. I'm thinking about how everyone and everything shapes what we become. I'm thinking about dinosaurs. And I'm also thinking about the fact that the popcorn at EVENT cinemas could only be more expensive if it was coated in cocaine instead of sea salt. (11 bucks? Are you fucking kidding me?)

Will you like it? I don't know. What do I look like? The Mentalist? (I don't even own a waistcoat.) What I do know is that The Tree of Life is challenging, full of emotion, stunningly beautiful but also at times confusing and even a touch boring. Probably a bit like dating Jessica Biel.

4 stars

SUMMARY: Discovery channel meets revolutionary road meets Koyaanisqatsi meets Stand by me

WHO SHOULD SEE IT: Jessica Biel fans, spicy chicken lovers. 
RELEASE DATE: In cinemas now

HARRY POTTER & THE DEATHLY HALLOWS: PART 2

HARRY POTTER AND THE HIGHBROW EYEBROWS

Review by: Yumi

I watched every Harry Potter movie except the second-last one and the consistent reaction I had to all films was –

“Wow, Emma Watson has great eyebrows.”

Those eyebrows should get an Oscar, no shit.

Other Great Eyebrows in Movies:

Jennifer Connelly

Camilla Belle

Agnes Deyn

Natalie Portman

Rachel McAdams

I really love the Harry Potter movies, although I’ve never given any of them a single thought once they’ve finished, save to think about how to get Emma Watson’s eyebrows or wondering when it’s legal to have a sexy thought about Ron Weasley.  They’re fun, but pretty forgettable.

There is something so pleasing about how they’ve assembled a lot of the giants of English acting and given them all a massive superannuation payout.  I freakin love it.  “Maggie Smith?  Here’s your Harry Potter Golden Handshake for Years of Service as a Top Thesp.”  Ka-ching!  Maggie Smith was actually one of the best things about Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows: Part 2.  James has talked about this before but 74 year-old Maggie Smith...older than my Mum’s car, older than my favourite cheese, older than any wine ever drank– Maggie Smith really has enough charisma to be sexy.  She’s freakin impressive.  She impresses me as much as Emma Watson’s eyebrows.

Hey, the other awesome thing about Emma Watson, besides being beautiful and, like, MEGA WEALTHY, is that she fronted ad campaigns for Burberry and even though she’s a quarter of the age of the women who can afford that stuff, she TOTALLY makes me lust after gaberdines.  And makes me need a trenchcoat, baaaad. 

So is Harry Potter worth the hype? 

Yeah, it is.  It’s pretty awesome.  One thing that makes the Potter films special is they make magic magical.  They’re not orgies of special effects like a Transformers movie where story and character get lost in the bleeps and bangs.  The great actors (Alan Rickman!  John Hurt!  Emma Thompson (painfully underused in this one)!  David Thewlis!) dominate the drama and seem to be in competition to make the tiniest roles an exercise in giant performance. 

And weirdly, this film made me think about death and what happens after it – and listen up – among the nerds and wizards, it’s entirely possible that YOU, TOO may have an existential moment as you peer into the great void. 

I love a good film that makes me think about death.  Recently the Mark Romanek film Never Let Me Go did that and the message was:  “We all die.  Let’s cherish life – and each other – while we can.”

Phew!

Ralph Fiennes, as Harry Potter’s arch-nemesis Lord Voldemort is a snivelling picture of evil, although weirdly, in spite of his menace, many people in the cinema got the giggles whenever he appeared.  He MAY have been a bit hungry, and he MAY have chewed up a bit of the scenery, but Fiennes’ career has been a very logical flow chart:

1993	1994	1998	2002	2008	2011
Schindler’s List	Quiz Show	The Avengers	Maid in Manhattan	The Hurt Locker	Harry Potter finale
Ultimate Nazi	Aryan cheat	Pommy putz	J-Lo’s bitch	A guy who’s gonna get shot in the head after 5 minutes on screen, mainly because of his shit bandanna	Ultimate bad guy

Sometimes you gotta accept that you’re good at something, and Ralph Fiennes is good at being a vagina-face.

STARS: 4 Stars!

SYNOPSIS: The grand climax!

WHO SHOULD SEE IT?  Fans, nerds, anyone who owns a cape, but maybe not kids under 13.

RELEASE DATE: In cinemas today

DELHI BELLY

Where was Tania Zaetta?

Review by: Jade

Yesterday I went to see the latest Bollywood film to hit Australian cinemas - Delhi Belly. 

As a lover of all things sparkly and glittering I was voted by the team to review this one. Plus I was once an extra in a Bollywood film, so I'm obviously an expert when it comes to Indian cinema (I couldn't understand a word of the script, had no idea what was going on and spent all day pacing up and down the train station which is pretty much my worst nightmare - exercise combined with public transport - ugh). 

So I have to admit, I went along to the cinema, expecting to see:

1. Tania Zaetta 

2. Lots of Indians 

3. A romantic musical 

4. Sequins, beads and bangles 

5. Subtitles 

From this list, I managed to get one right. There were lots of Indians there (in fact, I counted only 2 whiteys in the entire cinema). But I guessed wrong on all other counts.

Delhi Belly is an Indian comedy shot in English. It's a crazy comedy of errors which of course leads to a wild goose chase. Flatmates Tashi, Arun & Nitin find themselves in a Hangover style situation. But instead of drugs, it's diamonds. And instead of Bradley Cooper, it's Imran Khan.

No not the cricketer. 

Yes the actor. 

From the opening scene I knew this wasn't any traditional Bollywood film. I kept waiting for Will Ferrell to appear!

It does feel like an Indian film aimed at Western audiences. Or maybe it's aimed at Western / Indians. 

Random / Semi Related Fact: Imran Kahn who plays Tashi was actually born in the USA. His Dad is a consultant at professional networking site LinkedIn in Silicon Valley! Thanks imdb trivia!

The film was filled with fart and shit jokes - mainly because Nitin falls prey to a nasty piece of tandoori chicken. But the audience was LOVING it. No really. They were LOVING it. I have never been in a cinema where the audience was laughing so hysterically. It was outrageous.

But it wasn't just the farting and the shitting that had them in stitches. They rolled around laughing like mental people the entire film! It was awesome!

There's even a great Josie & The Pussycats moment with an Indian popstar who is like a cross between Ke$ha and the Scissor Sisters. Her hit single is I Hate You (LIke I Love You). 

I thought this film was loads of fun - despite the severe lack of sequins. I loved that it completely blew all my expectations away. It's not Slumdog Millionaire or Bend it Like Beckham. It's irreverent, funny and probably India's answer to the Harold & Kumar titles. 

I left the cinema with one burning question though... is Tania Zaetta in jail or something? 

STARS: 3.5 stars

SUMMARY: The Hangover Indian Styles 

WHO SHOULD SEE IT: Indians. Lovers of fart jokes. People wanting to experience something new and different

RELEASE DATE: Out now at selected Hoyts cinemas 

DISCLAIMER:

According to Wikipedia the definition of Bollywood is the informal term popularly used for the Hindi-language film industry based in Mumbai. The term is often incorrectly used to refer to the whole of Indian cinema

BA BAUUM. This isn't even a Bollywood film. Go on, just call me a racist. I know you want to.

JUST IN! BREAKING NEWS! After further research I managed to consult a professional from the Indian Film Industry. Tania Zaetta is not a Bollywood star or an Indian film star. She's just a d-grade celebrity from Australia who wears a sari and has a good publicist. The Indian film industry resent the association and request we stop pretending she's huge in their country.