DELHI BELLY

Where was Tania Zaetta?

Review by: Jade

Yesterday I went to see the latest Bollywood film to hit Australian cinemas - Delhi Belly. 

As a lover of all things sparkly and glittering I was voted by the team to review this one. Plus I was once an extra in a Bollywood film, so I'm obviously an expert when it comes to Indian cinema (I couldn't understand a word of the script, had no idea what was going on and spent all day pacing up and down the train station which is pretty much my worst nightmare - exercise combined with public transport - ugh). 

So I have to admit, I went along to the cinema, expecting to see:

1. Tania Zaetta 

2. Lots of Indians 

3. A romantic musical 

4. Sequins, beads and bangles 

5. Subtitles 

From this list, I managed to get one right. There were lots of Indians there (in fact, I counted only 2 whiteys in the entire cinema). But I guessed wrong on all other counts.

Delhi Belly is an Indian comedy shot in English. It's a crazy comedy of errors which of course leads to a wild goose chase. Flatmates Tashi, Arun & Nitin find themselves in a Hangover style situation. But instead of drugs, it's diamonds. And instead of Bradley Cooper, it's Imran Khan.

No not the cricketer. 

Yes the actor. 

From the opening scene I knew this wasn't any traditional Bollywood film. I kept waiting for Will Ferrell to appear!

It does feel like an Indian film aimed at Western audiences. Or maybe it's aimed at Western / Indians. 

Random / Semi Related Fact: Imran Kahn who plays Tashi was actually born in the USA. His Dad is a consultant at professional networking site LinkedIn in Silicon Valley! Thanks imdb trivia!

The film was filled with fart and shit jokes - mainly because Nitin falls prey to a nasty piece of tandoori chicken. But the audience was LOVING it. No really. They were LOVING it. I have never been in a cinema where the audience was laughing so hysterically. It was outrageous.

But it wasn't just the farting and the shitting that had them in stitches. They rolled around laughing like mental people the entire film! It was awesome!

There's even a great Josie & The Pussycats moment with an Indian popstar who is like a cross between Ke$ha and the Scissor Sisters. Her hit single is I Hate You (LIke I Love You). 

I thought this film was loads of fun - despite the severe lack of sequins. I loved that it completely blew all my expectations away. It's not Slumdog Millionaire or Bend it Like Beckham. It's irreverent, funny and probably India's answer to the Harold & Kumar titles. 

I left the cinema with one burning question though... is Tania Zaetta in jail or something? 

STARS: 3.5 stars

SUMMARY: The Hangover Indian Styles 

WHO SHOULD SEE IT: Indians. Lovers of fart jokes. People wanting to experience something new and different

RELEASE DATE: Out now at selected Hoyts cinemas 

DISCLAIMER:

According to Wikipedia the definition of Bollywood is the informal term popularly used for the Hindi-language film industry based in Mumbai. The term is often incorrectly used to refer to the whole of Indian cinema

BA BAUUM. This isn't even a Bollywood film. Go on, just call me a racist. I know you want to.

JUST IN! BREAKING NEWS! After further research I managed to consult a professional from the Indian Film Industry. Tania Zaetta is not a Bollywood star or an Indian film star. She's just a d-grade celebrity from Australia who wears a sari and has a good publicist. The Indian film industry resent the association and request we stop pretending she's huge in their country. 

THE HANGOVER PART 2

SAME SAME BUT DIFFERENT

Review by: Jade

The title says it all. The Hangover Part 2 is essentially the same story and same premise as the original. So what's different? Well I can't tell you because that would spoil it.

What I can tell you about this film is this...

- I laughed out loud 5 times but I laughed on the inside maybe 10 times

- It's all about Alan. I didn't laugh for the first 10 minutes of the film until Alan appeared – just the sight of him makes you want to roll around on the floor. Especially with his awesome yellow Labrador t-shirt and his pronunciation of Thailand

- A smoking monkey will always win hearts 

- Mr. Chow is back but his Engrish accent just isn't up to scratch

- Bradley Cooper is sexy but you can’t help wondering if maybe he’s gay

- I have a friend who looks uncannily similar to Alan and it kept scaring me

- Mike Tyson sings in the film. This was one of my 5 laugh-out-loud moments 

- As far as sequels go, it’s pretty good

The other day I came home to hear my flatmate Mel screaming uproariously and rolling around on the couch watching the original Hangover. She almost fell off she was laughing so hard. And since James stood me up, I took Mel along to see The Hangover Part 2.

Set in Thailand, it would be a crime if the film weren’t riddled with Asian gags, clichés and stereotypes. 

James and I have actually been to Bangkok together with our own Wolfpack and had our own version of the Hangover. But we were not getting married. And Mike Tyson was not there. But we did go to a strip joint. And we did see two ladies "performing" to My Heart Will Go On. I spent more money at the strip joints than I did at the shops (which says something considering I brought home 2 extra suitcases). The girls obviously thought I was one of them and would always ask me for money - not James or any of the other 4 men I was traveling with. No, they thought I would understand and be sympathetic. Which brings me to my next point - I was with 5 white men - making me look like the best whore in town. 

We also met some Australasian med students who tried to push their drugs on me (in fact they were drugs that help us Asian's break down alcohol because apparently 50% of us don't have the enzyme that does break it down).

This is the only photo I took on the entire trip. 

We went superclubbing where a band was playing in the ladies bathroom. We went to a fight in a bar. One of our friends met the love of his life. And on the plane home, we watched My Friend Flicker, which brought James to tears.

TOP 5 MOVIES I WATCHED ON A PLANE THAT MADE ME CRY

1. Morning Glory

2. Marley & Me

3. The Back Up Plan

4. Valentines Day

5. The Ugly Truth

I’m not sure what it is about rom coms that makes me

a) want to watch them on planes and

b) cry (and I’m talking genuine, real sobbing kinda stuff where I have to blow my nose on the cheap blanket they give you)

Anyway this really has nothing to do with The Hangover Part 2. Except to highlight that maybe our trip to Bangkok was just as fun as the real Wolfpacks. Only we came home with all our fingers and none of us got buttfucked (although I can't really vouch for all the guys).

And maybe the other reason I told you about mine and James' trip was because I really don't have much to say about this film without giving the good stuff away - because let's face it, if you've seen the original you already know the storyline. Anything worth mentioning will ruin it for you.

The Hangover Part 2 is fun, ridiculous and it will make you laugh. Mel laughed. But she didn’t fall out of her seat. Me I'm bias - I still think Chin or the Ranch is funnier.


Oh and here's some background for those who do not know what P.F.Changs is... It's a Chinese restaurant chain in the US that specialises in Western-made shit Chinese food.

STARS: 3 stars

SUMMARY: Two nights in Bangkok 

WHO SHOULD SEE IT: Fans of the original Hangover. Racists.

RELEASE DATE: Out Now